Category Archives: Music

My love affair with Portugal started in 1986. It was the last country of Osho’s World Tour. I was one of three main cook’s in the house where he was staying together with a small group of people looking after him. Mukti cooked for Osho while I shared a separate kitchen and its responsibilities with Japanese Geeta. We cooked for the rest of the household which included Maneesha and Amrito, who stayed nonstop busy transcribing Osho’s recently given discourses from Uruguay. These would eventually become two lovely books: Beyond Psychology and Transmission of the Lamp. Shunyo took care of Osho’s laundry. Nirvano was his personal caretaker. Gayan and Arpito looked after his robes and shoes. Nivedano did the shopping and helped-out with practical things around the house. Rafia, too, although he also took photographs. Anando was secretary. And Cliff was the pilot and all-round trouble shooter (and fixer of all the things that caused trouble!).

The spacious house sat deep in a pine forest, high in the hills above the historic city, Sintra, a mere twenty kilometers from Lisbon. I had the afternoon-off one day. Rafia and I had agreed to meet after lunch and take a long walk. The month was August and it was hot. Smoke filled the air from all the wildfires burning in the surrounding countryside. Lately, I had been taking note of a strange sound I had never heard before that was coming from the forest. I realized it was from pinecones literally exploding from the heat.

Rafia and I headed up the dirt driveway. We quickly reached the paved road which ran along the ridge. We had no map. We were just following our intuition. Which direction for us didn’t matter. We just needed to walk and talk. People think, “Oh, it must have been so amazing to be close to Osho and living in his house.” I would be dishonest to deny this but in reality there was a certain tension in the atmosphere — not from Osho but from the uncertainty of his situation. None of us knew from one moment to the next if the police would suddenly come and ask him to leave as had happened in so many countries before. Definitely, the house was being watched. There was always an unmarked police car parked up the road with two men-in-black. Then there was the fact that his sannyasins couldn’t be with him. So many of my friends were scattered all over the world. And I knew there wasn’t a sannyasin alive who wouldn’t have died to be in my shoes. This was the source of a nagging pain, a tension, in my heart. It did not fully disappear until Osho returned to Pune and Commune’s Gateless Gates were open to receive the world and his people. Meanwhile, Hasyo, Yogi, and Jayesh stayed busy with politicians and real estate agents, trying to secure for Osho a more permanent residence and status. All of these things combined contributed the collective tension in the household, even if on the surface things might have looked calm and collected. But, there is nothing like a long walk and a chit-chat with a dear friend to moderate such kinds of stress and anxieties.

So we walked, Rafia and I, and as we did, our talk shifted into high-gear. Soon the pine forest gave way to an open vista of dry, rolling brown hills. Neither of us was familiar with the geography of Portugal. Google Map was still twenty years in the future. Not far in the distance we could see the sea which from our perspective looked tantalizingly close, so blue and sparkling, and seemed to be calling to us. It was an obvious choice when we reached a fork in the road: we took the way that made a single, straight-line down the hill to the water.

Fast forward to Portugal, Year 2013 and the Osho Heart Festival happening in Oeiras, a suburb of Lisbon on the Tagus River. I was on a lunch break, out having a walk when I had a déjà vu. I had a strong recognition of one of the traffic circles and signs on my way. Later that evening, I opened Google Map and saw that same straight line of road down from the Sintra Hills to the sea. It dawned on me, these were the same landmarks Rafia and I had passed twenty-eight years before on our walk. How amazing we had been so close, just a few kilometers from the current Osho festival venue!

Rafia and I eventually reached the sea and, what I know now, the small town of Estoril. Having skipped lunch back at the house, we were hungry. We found a small restaurant right on the water and if I remember correctly, had best grilled sardines of our lives (I know this will make my Portuguese friends smile). Bellies full, we filled our lungs one last time with the fresh sea air and began retracing our steps back up the hill. The problem was we had talked so much on the way down we hadn’t noticed how far we had come. As we grew more silent with every step, the sun and heat were relentless, and my awareness was drawn again and again to my feet. I was getting blisters.

Thirty kilometers later, we reached the house. I swear, when we jumped in the pool, we both sizzled and popped like those pine cones I had been hearing. I imagine our adventure was entered by the gods in The Akashic Records and it remains one of the epic walks of my life. Rafia and I still laugh and shake our heads about it when we meet. When I came out of the pool, Rafia was pointing to the house with his eyes and a nod of his head. There was Osho, standing on his balcony, relaxed in his white casual robe with one hand on his hip, and watching us. He was too far away to tell if he was chuckling. But I am quite sure he must have when Nirvano told him of our adventure later that evening.

As it happened, Osho eventually was asked to leave by the Portuguese government. It was the last straw in a long saga that had been unfolding since the end of Rajneespuram, the Oregon Commune. Neelam was traveling in Europe and Osho asked that she be called to come to Portugal immediately. He had decided to go back to India and she would accompany him. The rest of us would have to use our wits and follow on when, and however, we could manage. I guess all of us must have reached Mumbai within a month or so of him, but these were uncertain times. For everyone.

All of our household-in-the-pines, plus a support team and handful of friends who had been staying in Sintra, gathered in the spacious living room of the house. We would all be going with Osho and Neelam to the airport to see them off. A convoy of cars waited outside. I had my guitar ready with a makeshift strap I had put together with shoelaces. Suddenly, the door of his room flew open and there he was in full glory, a hurricane of energy and light: Osho in full celebration mode. I struggled to keep up with him. I scrubbed away on those six steel strings of my guitar with all the energy I could summon while Osho danced like a madman with each and everyone present. Tears flow even now as I type these words. Such was the energy of the moment. Rafia was always somewhere in the background taking what would turn out to be some of the most precious photos imaginable. Since the first time I met Osho, he seemed like a faraway star, a god, which from my side created a certain formal distance with him. But what was happening now felt so human, intimate, and touching; a special feeling that only happens when hearts overflow with unbounded joy.

Osho danced on. I knew the song I was singing was everyone’s song: not just the song of those here, but the song of all my friends and the sannyasins around the world who longed, but could not, be here today. The celebration moved outside the house with Osho. Suddenly, he spotted Rafia. I will always remember Rafia’s crazy dance, his cameras swinging wildly as he tried to control them in vain. When the sun wants to dance with you, all ideas about control fly out the window. Nirvano had been keeping a respectful distance, her delicate hands folded in namaste and her tears flowing. The celebration began reaching a crescendo as Osho neared the cars and she became overwhelmed. She took a few steps towards him and fell sobbing into his arms which seemed like great wings the way the folded around her. It was a touching moment not-of-this-world: Osho holding her with one arm while with the other orchestrating the celebration and keeping the energy high — and me alive! I will never know how I managed to find the right chords and strength to play on, but I did.

Earlier in the afternoon, Yogi had asked me if I would drive one of the cars to the airport and I agreed. He asked if I needed a map and I said no. I have always prided myself with my sense of direction. But … this time I got lost. I must have missed a sign or something. Quite quickly, I found myself and my precious cargo — Neelam, Arpita, and Gayan — lost in a confusing network of small roads of Lisbon city-center. I asked directions and luckily got us back on the highway and speeding in the direction of the airport. But my stress level was off the charts. I was fifteen minutes late from the appointed time Yogi said I needed to be there. When we walked into the terminal, Osho stood surrounded by the group and chatting with Nirvano. I felt terrible and irresponsible. Later afterwards when sharing with Rafia, he said, “Oh Mila, you should not feel bad. It was actually great you were late.” As it turned out, my being late had given Nirvano and Osho a little bit of extra time to say goodbye. Rafia said this was so important.

I could not have foreseen this scenario. I would never have consciously chosen to be late. But like so many things around Osho, the most unusual circumstances can become a valuable life-lesson. I was reminded of this once again in Darshan’s Family Constellation Training last week here in Oeiras. Everything happens for a reason, and sometimes for reasons not always obvious at the time. For me, it is not easy to see the positive side of certain life situations that come my way because of the lens I see myself through. Too often, Life throws me a curve ball and I feel bad and take it negatively. Getting lost when the Master has a flight to catch is just such a curveball. Because of the unexpected way things unfolded, I could have easily beaten myself up a lot (which I did for a while) and internalized a lot of unworthy feelings. But the experience became a lesson in Trust: What Is, is.  How important it is to understand this! And to ACCEPT that things are the way they are for all the RIGHT reasons. Remembering this, I can be more loving and gentle with myself. Yes, I know there is responsibility for all one’s actions and Life choices, always. But the key is to not get too serious. Especially when things go in a direction I don’t expect or can control — which they have a tendency to do and will! My solution? Laugh, Breathe, Relax, and Roll with whatever situation, good or bad, Life presents me with.

Usually I don’t share Osho stories because it requires speaking about him in the past tense. But when I do tell a story, I always try to give it a context in the here and now because, after all, it is here and now where Osho is, timeless and eternal. Osho is another word for the energy of transformation. So whether it is August 1986 or August 2014, what is the difference as far as Osho is concerned? Osho is as much in my heart today as he was that hot Portugal afternoon when he came out of his room blazing like a hurricane.

And so it is, the mystery (and miracle) I find myself in Portugal today, here-now, still celebrating this Great Affair, a wild romance that makes my heart sing and dance. The Osho Heart Festival begins this Thursday, August 14, on the ever-flowing Tagus River where it reaches the Sea, and amazingly, just down the hill from Osho’s pine forest. I look forward to celebrating yet again the energy of transformation that makes this world a lotus paradise. Osho!

Fresh Start

The New Year is just around the corner! And what better way to welcome it in than with medita-tion? It is a good time to clean off the dust from one’s mirror, say goodbye to the past — all those ups and downs and all arounds — and step into the unknown fresh, with clear eyes and an easy heart.

I invite you to Zorba Studio in Dallas, Texas, January 1st – friends, lovers, even those new to meditation – to join me kickstarting the New Year with one of the best meditations on the planet: Dynamic Meditation. I guarantee it will be one of the BEST, most POWERFUL and LIBERATING Dynamic Meditations ever!

After Dynamic, the celebration with continue with lots more meditation, dance, song, silence, Osho, wonderful food and opportunities to meet, hug, laugh, play, share, or simply be alone. Everything will finish up around 4pm.

Meditation, Love, Celebration and a Healthy Dose of Laughter. Doesn’t this sound like a perfect start to the New Year? If so,  please join me and let’s bring it on (or IN! as the case may be).

A Long Walk

Ah, the ups and downs.
Riding the waves.
Drifting like wood, sun-bleached and silky smooth.
Rolling with the heaving swell
Breathing blue bosom of the Universe
Ah, yes.
The ups and downs
Of Life.

Letting go is how I feel, especially this time of year,
When colors change and leaves Fall,
And another energy nova-blast, the tour, comes to pause.
I won’t say ‘end’ because that’s not quite true.
Only semi-colons here, not full stops, will do.
Death may prove me wrong on this existential point
But I suspect when I have breathed my last,
Celebration will indeed go on.

Strange indeed to feel so empty,
Yet so completely full and simply
Goes the poem by Robert Frost: “Miles and miles to go before I sleep”
Simple words, yet they affirm
The feeling in these tired but happy
Bones and feet.

Van and equipment, all returned; musicians and dear friends too.
Last bills paid and now
Here I am
Cast up on the sand one more time,
One last wave.

Always is the case there follows a gap
And even so, I know
This too shall pass.
What lingers now, a sweet kind of pain
Whose only way to sooth I know the knack, and that
Is a long walk somewhere
There and back.

The Invitation

Teerth has been traveling and playing with me for a lot of years — many tours, many events, many miles. So when we hugged and he said to me after finishing loading the van one last time in New York, “Mila, I think this was the best tour ever” it means something. I agree: It was the best tour ever.

Atlanta set the pace with Anuradha, Paritosh, and the Osho Atlanta team sponsoring the band for the first time. Great job, beloveds, finding such a gorgeous venue: the Red Top Mountain State Park. Cabins have been set aside for next year so the event can be residential. I have played many sannyas celebrations in my day, but the one in Atlanta Saturday evening took celebration to a whole new level. Like I say, Atlanta set the pace. It was also nice we could celebrate Teerth’s birthday Sunday evening.

This year marked sixteen years of the USA events. The energy ball that started rolling in Atlanta expanded in Dallas, Chicago, and New York. At the start of each event, we shared one of Osho’s lesser known meditations, Gourishankar. This meditation remains as much an enigma as when I first experienced it in Pune 1976. I find it such an unusual technique, and especially powerful when done with live-music and a blue strobe light. I am fascinated by the subtle way in which it works. And in some mysterious fashion, it set the tone for each events and all that followed.

The drives are always long, but also fun. I stopped counting somewhere between Chicago and New York once we passed the eight thousand mile mark. Chandira, Teerth, and I were the basic music team. We were joined along the way by many lovely, talented friends. In Atlanta, Prakash and Lee. In Dallas, Lee and Rajmani. In Chicago, Ashik came on board with the violin; also Prashant, Gillian, Anand, and Sargie. Lee managed yet another miracle (supported by an angel in Dallas) and surprised us again in New York where we were also joined by Sharabo. Wow, is all I can say!

If there was anything difficult about this year’s tour, it has been choosing the photos. There were many and they all say so much. Joy seems to leap right out from them: all the shining faces, the silence, the gratitude, the celebration … so many touching moments that can only be acknowledged by tears and a silent nod of the head. Priya, the New York organizer, decided to advertised her event as “The Invitation” which became this year’s theme. I think I speak for everyone when I say I am happy I accepted the “invitation” and could be a participant in the Feast.

Atlanta

Dallas

Chicago

New York

The Calling

In August, I traveled to Portugal for a delightful four-day festival organized by the Osho Darshan Zen Center. The venue was a divine location just outside Lisbon, on the River Tagus where it reaches the sea. All of us who were up early were treated each morning to the most-amazing sunrises. The air was so fresh and clean it made breathing stage in Dynamic Meditation a sheer delight. The days were full from morning to evening with workshops, music, dancing, song, laughter, and connecting. There was also ample time to relax and just be.

After the festival, I had some days to enjoy the beautiful Atlantic coastline of Cascais. Incredible to imagine I had been here in 1986 when Osho was in Sintra, just up the hill a few kilometers away. It was the last stop on his World Tour before returning to India. During my morning walks as I looked out across the sea, nothing seemed different as it did then: same sea, same vastness, same timeless. And yet the saying goes: “so much water down The Ganges”. Indeed, life is a paradox, a mystery, and time a very strange thing. Many times in these days I was reminded of this.

Before my flight home, I enjoyed to explore one of my favorite cities in the world: Lisbon. I don’t know why I click there, but I do. I love the atmosphere. I love the feeing of Portugal’s long history vibrating in the air and so tangible. I see I have used the word ‘love’ twice in two sentences to decribe this city. Yes, I guess it is also romantic! And perhaps because of the closeness of the river and sea, the Portuguese, and even visitors like myself, hear the call: the call to explore the horizon and see what lies beyond. It could be a metaphor for meditation and the Search. After this festival and my relaxed holidays, not to mention all the soft, loving hearts I met everywhere along the way, I left Portugal feeling a renewed enthusiasm to explore: Not so much the world outside myself, but the world inside that keeps calling me on. Thank you, beloved friends. I will see you again.

Europe Summer Tour

It has been a summer of festivals in Europe, starting with Festi’ Spirit near St. Tropez, France; the No Mind Festival in Angsbaka, Sweden; the Osho RISK Summer Festival in Denmark; and the annual Zurich Festival of Meditation and Celebration in Swizerland. We enjoyed wonderful summer weather for the most part and lots of adventures together as a band. There were many highlights along the way as I think you will see scrolling through the photos. Enjoy!

Spring Symphony

Winters can seem long, but Spring has a way of eventually arriving. It may be a little late in some years. But it never misses an appointment; nor does it disappoint. It always arrives with an explosion of color and inspiration — for the eyes, the heart and soul.

This little clip is a tribute to one of my favorite seasons http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SqTAgTGsyvs. I took the photos within walking distance of my home nearby the famous Shenandoah River, Blue Ridge Mountains, and Shenandoah National Park of Virginia. The music I composed while exploring with new recording software.

“I was tired and sleeping on my idle bed, and imagined all work had ceased. In the morning I woke up, and found my garden full with wonders of flowers.”  Rabindranath Tagore

It’s All Good

I recently celebrated my sixtieth birthday in style with good friends, cake, plenty of champagne, music and dancing in New York City and Virginia; also in Dallas where I facilitated an unscheduled event and continued work on my new homepage design. Which is, by the way, finished now. Yahoo! The newly-added shop gives a possibility to share the music and meditations easily and make them more available.

The work was a lot and took me most of the winter but I got into it. I also learned some new things. In the last months, I have been leaning more towards being a geek than a musician. Now with my guitars freshly out of the shop after some much-needed TLC, I look forward to playing and the tour dates ahead.

I always thought when I turned sixty, my eyes would turn more towards The Himalayas and retirement, but surprise:  the celebration continues!

Celebrating Everything — Even the Cold!

I think of myself as a warm-weather person. Which is kind of strange because in recent years I always seem to find myself in the deepest of winter somewhere on the planet. To the point I thought to myself last summer, I really really have to be in a warm climate this winter. But alas. As fate, or as I am finding out — good fortune — would have it, I was suddenly on a plane December twenty-forth,  flying to Denmark and into the dark, Scandanavian deep-freeze. But something beautiful awaited me: the Osho RISK Winter Festival and many warm, loving friends; also some wonderful musician (new aquaintances and dear friends from past collaborations) — all of which was a big part of the pull I felt that got me on the plane in the first place. We were enough crazy hearts to create some wonderful high-energy celebration, but also some quieter, more silent music for the meditations. So, let’s see: there was that wonderful Jazz Cafe evening; and that super New Year’s Eve party; and all that wonderful food; and the many juicy workshops; and … and the Gangam-style dancing, of course! If I have to sum it all up in one word it is “wow!” Just “wow!” So much wow in fact I completely forgot about the weather. I mean, who cares really when one is having so much fun? The reality is, the festival helped open my eyes to see that even the coldest, bleakest winter has its beauty. With this insight still fresh, I say goodbye to the great year that was and welcome in the New Year that will be.