I want to share a live-track of music I’ve been working on recently. It also gives an opportunity to share a little of my experience about Osho.
One of the questions I get a lot at events is: “Can you tell me how it was to be with Osho when he was in the body?” This immediately puts me in a dilemma because I have to speak about something in the past when in fact Osho is a realtime, moment-to-moment, living experience for me. When someone tells me they “missed” by not being with Osho when he was alive, what are they really saying? Rather than dive into a world of memories and what was, I do my best to share with them there were perhaps people around Osho when he was in-the-body who missed him. Also, that I experience Osho much more now than I ever did then. Yet, for those with a deep angst of missing, such sharings are not easily convincing. My sense is if someone is missing Osho in the past, they are likely missing Osho (and something in their life) in the present. I am not saying the question or questioner is wrong. But it seems the real question to be asking is: “What am I missing NOW?” And as I see it, no reminiscing about the past is going to provide the answer.
Now with a new film about Rajneeshpuram soon to be released on Netflix (www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBLS_OM6Puk&feature=youtu.be), again there is going to be a lot of looking back and reminiscing about the old times. Yes, it will give another angle on Osho and his sannyasins, perhaps interesting for those who weren’t there; and for a few fleeting days will hang around until the next sensationalized documentary comes along. But is this fascination with Osho-in-the-past answer going to answer any sincere seeker’s questions? I lived at The Ranch — all four years. And I have said many times they were the four best years of my life. No film or discussion about those days can possibly be more fulfilling for me. I don’t really need to see this film to know what it is: just entertainment, focusing more on the container not the content, and ultimately a distraction from what I consider Osho to be about: meditation.
At the risk of sounding too preachy and serious here, I want to say to anyone reading this post who has feelings they missed Osho in-the-body: Osho is not about looking back. Osho is about looking in. Osho is a quality of meditation. Osho IS meditation. If one really wants to know Osho — past, present, or future — one needs to know meditation. And to know meditation, one needs to walk the talk and DO IT. I was recently chatting with one of the New York City friends from the Osho Padma Center. We we were discussing the new Rajneespuram film and he asked me what I thought. He laughed when I said as far as I am concerned all roads lead to Joeffry Ballet Studio where Dynamic Meditation happens every Saturday morning in Manhattan. Why? Because in my experience, only meditation can answer the question everyone on some level is longing to know: who they are.
I know nothing from my past can ever satisfy another’s “I missed Osho” feelings; nor do I think anyone is going to come to know Osho by seeing this Netflix film. What I do know is this: these “I-am-missing-something-in-my-life” feelings in others are the same longings that took me to India and Osho’s feet many years ago. I admit I was lucky. I call it a divine accident the way I stumbled across Osho. Funny thing is: I thought I found someone who could answer my questions. Instead, I found someone who turned my eyes inward and stumbled across something even more remarkable — myself.
A little about the music… it is an early 1990’s live recording from Evening Satsang in Buddha Hall. My memory is a bit rusty but I believe it is from one of the festivals. It’s a big band playing. I must have invited every sannyas musician in Pune at the time! What I like about the track is its energy, what for me Osho is all about: energy. I am very picky about White Robe music. Not all of it turns me on. But this works. At least for me. And not because I am playing on it! It is a wild sea of celebration. The singing opens the heart, the instruments give flight to the soul. It also has something of the unexpected in it, like when music papers get tossed to the wind and musicians slip out of their minds. You will hear Somesh (electric guitar) and Yashu (flute) playing, two of the few musicians who played for energy darshans in Pune l. When I hear them on this recording I know why they were chosen by Osho. In my understanding, Evening Satsang music is never a performance. Its purpose is to engage and lift. It is an energetic preparation for listening to Osho’s discourse. I know (and perhaps many have had this experience) that when I’ve had a good dance and a deep let-go in the silent sitting, it is much easier to be attentive and absorb the inspiration from Osho’s words. Indeed, this is the genius of the meditation. When done totally, it is a comprehensive package for transformation that gives a direct experience of Osho — who we are beyond space and time. Pure and simple.
“Once you have seen a buddha, an enlightened one, a tremendous flame suddenly starts blossoming in you, ‘If this beauty, this grace, this wisdom, this blissfulness can happen to any man, then why can it not happen to me?’ As far as human beings are concerned, we have the same seeds and the same potentiality. But a seed can remain a seed and may never become a flower, although there was every possibility available. But rather than disappearing in the soil, the seed can remain safe, hiding in a stone cave, thinking that it is too rainy outside, worrying that it is too sunny outside, fearing the unknown. It feels cozy in the closed silence of the cave, but there it cannot grow, there it will simply get rotten. There it will simply remain something… it could have been a beautiful manifestation, it simply remains unmanifested, a song unsung, a poetry unwritten, a life unlived. It is very essential to find a man who can provoke in you the challenge to attain to your heights. The master is nothing but a challenge — if it has happened to me, it can happen to you. And the authentic master — there are so many teachers propounding doctrines, beliefs, philosophies — the authentic master is not concerned with words; is not concerned with beliefs, atheism or theism; is not concerned even with God, or heaven and hell. The authentic master is concerned only with one single thing — to provoke you to see your potentiality, to see inwards. His presence makes you silent, his words deepen your silence, his very being slowly starts melting your falseness, your mask, your personality.” Osho – Dogen, the Zen Master #4